MYEvents: Thursday, October 2, 2014 – Wednesday, October 8, 2014

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Hey there, bright young girls!!

*~ MYEvents will run every Thursday evening at 6:00pm, Pacific Standard Time. ~*

*~MYGirls Blog Series will run every Friday evening at 6:00pm, Pacific Standard Time. ~*

 

MYEvents will list all upcoming events.  They will either be free & open to the community, by RSVP, or by ticket purchase.  If you see an event listed, YOU’RE INVITED!!

 

 

Saturday, October 4, 2014 – 

2014TS

Inspirational community leaders will come together with Charlotte’s Korner, Inc., to encourage, empower, and uplift our youth, as various issues concerning our teens will be discussed.  CLICK HERE for more information, or how to become a volunteer, vendor, or guest speaker.  (I will be one of the guest speakers, so please come in support of GU4AP!)

 

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Stylists from various places will come together to battle for 1st Place.  Come to experience the fusion of fashion and fun.  The perfect “Mommy & Me” Day!! Visit HERE for more information.

 

 

Thursday, October 16, 2014 – 

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ATTENTION ALL PARENTS, this one’s for you.  Fashion models and designers from across America will gather together for a night of glitz, glam, and good entertainment!  Bring two canned goods to help with the LA Runway Food Drive!!  Email anerrickmanagement@yahoo.com for more information.

 

 

Saturday, October 18, 2014

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Meet wonderful spiritual women as they gather together to examine & tackle stereotypes, lift the burdens of limitation, and offer a insight into the life challenges that women face on a daily basis.  REGISTER NOW to catch Early Bird registration.

 

 

Friday, November 14th, 2014 – 

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Dynamic leaders will be honored and celebrated on this night of wonder.  SEE INFO Here for sponsorship packages.

 

 

 

ON-GOING EVENTS FOR 2014 – 

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FREE!!  Parenting Classes for Africans, African Americans, and Caribbeans.
Unfortunately NO court- or D.C.F.S.-ordered clientele will be accepted.
Call (323) 777-3120 for more information.

Brought to you by the Coalition of Mental health Professionals, Inc.
9219 S. Broadway Ave., Los Angeles, CA 90003

 

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Showroom G is a creative talent firm geared towards pushing your brand out to the community, in the most elaborate ways.  Come see a weekly showcase of awesome designers who work hard to make you look good!  Click HERE for more information.

 

 

Staying in the know with what’s going on in the community, helps us to stay connected to each other. and keep our youth with an optimistic mindset.  We must work together for the good of our world, our countries, our states, our nations, our cultures, our communities, our neighborhoods, our families . . . and ourselves.  For we are all “family.”  Fellow members of the human race.  We need each other more than we might know.

Share these events with your families.  And if there are any events that you know of and would like to share with MYGirls, please contact me, and I will list them.  Let’s get involved, young girls!!

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-Kahlelah, MYGirls

MYGirls: Let’s Talk About Leadership & Self-Esteem (Part 2: Competition, and “Frienemies”)

*~ MYEvents will run every Thursday evening at 6:00pm, Pacific Standard Time. ~*

*~MYGirls Blog Series will run every Friday evening at 6:00pm, Pacific Standard Time. ~*

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Why hello, lovely young girls!!

Hopefully, by now, you all have been able to follow the MYGirls Blog Series  These blog entries, along with suggested reads from @, @, and @, are here for your viewing pleasure, as well as to provide insight and tips on how to be successful in school, build & maintain friendships, improve on home-based routines and responsibilities, and overall navigate through life in general.  We bloggers speak to you from experience, to both inspire and prepare you for what’s to come in the near (and distant future).

So far within the MYGirls Blog Series, we have covered Social Media Etiquette, Appearance & Personal Hygiene (broken into two parts), Academics, and  Leadership & Self-Esteem (Part 1).  Today we will discuss Part 2 of the Leadership & Self-Esteem topic:  Competition & “Frienemies.”

teen-girls-s22-photo-of-competing-sisters By now, young girls, you should all be well-established in your classes, have developed great acquaintanceship with your teachers, joined clubs & organizations . . . maybe even a spirit squad!  But most definitely, you all should have begun friendships with your peers.  Some of these friendships may end up being temporary, even though they are begun with the goal of them lasting after high school, well into adulthood.

We choose our friends for many reasons.  As stated in Let’s Talk About Appearance & Personal Hygiene (Part 1:  Personal Hygiene), [with our friends, we are] sharing commonalities like favorite colors, favorite “girly” products (lip gloss, sweet-smelling lotions & body sprays, hair pins, etc), favorite courses & teachers, mutual friends, likes & dislikes, and the list goes on.  Much of our self-esteem comes from the influence of our friends.  To go deeper, we choose our friends based on how they make us feel when we are around them.  A good friend will make us laugh, comfort us when we are hurt, congratulate us for our achievements, encourage us, uplift us, and most importantly, support us.  A good friend helps us to discover ourselves and allows us to be ourselves, accepting us for who we are without casting judgment.

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A good friend will push you forward, to help you reach your highest potential.  A good friend wants to see you win, even if it means she temporarily loses.  And she wants to see you win, without jealousy.   A good friend respects you in a leadership role, sometimes more so than those not considered friends who are under your leadership.  Young girls, do your friends support you?  Are they genuinely happy when you win something, especially if you are competing against each other?  Do they feel as though your friendships are mere bouts of competition?

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There are several different ways you can evaluate your friendships; I would like to concentrate on 3 of them:

  • Accomplishments – say you made the Honor Roll, made captain of the basketball team, or earned the position of student body President . . . do your friends congratulate you, or brush it off as if it weren’t as big as something major that they have achieved?
  • Information – say you have the same class as your friends, and you are out of school for the day due to illness . . . do your friends share their class notes with you and inform you of any homework assignments that are due, or do they keep it to themselves which will put you at risk of a lowered grade?
  • Opportunity – say auditions for the school play are approaching, and your friends find out before you do . . . do they inform you of the upcoming date(s), or do they keep it to themselves in hopes you won’t get a shot at showcasing your talents?

If your friends cannot congratulate and support you in your accomplishments, share important information with you, or pass along a great opportunity to you, chances are you may have befriended frienemies.

 

27cityroom-wrestling-blog480 Sometimes we find that those whom we consider to be our friends, are our enemies in disguise.  Thus, “frienemies.”  A frienemy is someone who is nice, sweet, and friendly at first, in hopes that she keeps us close.  But because a frienemy thrives off of having someone around to validate them, she will keep us close to purposely turn us into her unwilling competitor.  She always wants to be better than us, so she will find ways to place us in an ‘us-versus-them’ situation.  Over time, a frienemy will eventually become your full-fledged enemy.

 

Young girls, it is very important that we are careful and mindful when we select our friends.  We must choose friends who bring out the best in us . . . and expect nothing less.  Remember, our friends are reflections of us:  we are the company we keep . . . we are who we hang out with.  It is important that YOU are also the humorous, comforting, congratulatory, encouraging, uplifting, and supportive friend that you aim to attract.  It’s okay to have a friend to win something over you.  It’s okay that your weakness might be her strength.  It’s okay that she might make a better class president . . . you might make a better team captain.  We all have our own strengths and weaknesses.  We all have areas in which we make great leaders.  We are equal to our friends, but not always identical, and that is perfectly fine!  Do not let that discourage you, young girls.

We are all winners together, even if only one takes the medal! AR-706209459

 

 

Next week’s blog:  Health (Part 1:  Diet)

 

 

-Kahlelah, MYGirls

 

MYEvents: Thursday, September 25, 2014 – Wednesday, October 1, 2014

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Hello brilliant young girls!!

*~ MYEvents will run every Thursday evening at 6:00pm, Pacific Standard Time. ~*

*~MYGirls Blog Series will run every Friday evening at 6:00pm, Pacific Standard Time. ~*

 

 

MYEvents will list all upcoming events.  They will either be free & open to the community, by RSVP, or by ticket purchase.  If you see an event listed, YOU’RE INVITED!!

 

Thursday, September 25, 2014

Community-Plan-Launch-September-25-2014-800x500px

The mission of the South Los Angeles Homeless Transition Age Youth (TAY) and Foster Care Collaborative is to prevent and end youth homelessness in South Los Angeles.  RSVP Here to register for the community event to help end homelessness within our youth.

 

 

Saturday, October 4, 2014 – 

2014TS

Inspirational community leaders will come together with Charlotte’s Korner, Inc., to encourage, empower, and uplift our youth, as various issues concerning our teens will be discussed.  CLICK HERE for more information, or how to become a volunteer, vendor, or guest speaker.  (I will be one of the guest speakers, so please come in support of GU4AP!)

 

 

Friday, November 14th, 2014 – 

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Dynamic leaders will be honored and celebrated on this night of wonder.  SEE INFO Here for sponsorship packages.

 

 

ON-GOING EVENTS FOR 2014 – 

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FREE!!  Parenting Classes for Africans, African Americans, and Caribbeans.
Unfortunately NO court- or D.C.F.S.-ordered clientele will be accepted.
Call (323) 777-3120 for more information.

Brought to you by the Coalition of Mental health Professionals, Inc.
9219 S. Broadway Ave., Los Angeles, CA 90003

 

 

Staying in the know with what’s going on in the community, helps us to stay connected to each other. and keep our youth with an optimistic mindset.  We must work together for the good of our world, our countries, our states, our nations, our cultures, our communities, our neighborhoods, our families . . . and ourselves.  For we are all “family.”  Fellow members of the human race.  We need each other more than we might know.

Share these events with your families.  And if there are any events that you know of and would like to share with MYGirls, please contact me, and I will list them.  Let’s get involved, young girls!!

 

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-Kahlelah, MYGirls

MYGirls: Let’s Talk About Leadership & Self-Esteem (Part 1)

ATTENTION ALL YOUNG GIRLS:

*~ The MYGirls Blog Series will run every Friday, at 6:00pm Pacific Standard Time. ~*

Greetings, outstanding young girls!!

Hopefully, by now, you all have been able to follow the MYGirls Blog Series  These blog entries, along with suggested reads from @, @, and @, are here for your viewing pleasure, as well as to provide insight and tips on how to be successful in school, build & maintain friendships, improve on home-based routines and responsibilities, and overall navigate through life in general.  We bloggers speak to you from experience, to both inspire and prepare you for what’s to come in the near (and distant future).

So far within the MYGirls Blog Series, we have covered Social Media Etiquette, Appearance & Personal Hygiene (broken into two parts), and Academics.  Today’s topic (now broken into two parts) will zero in on something that affects all young girls, worldwide:  Leadership & Self-Esteem (Part 1).

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Leadership & Self-Esteem are extremely important to me when it comes to young girls, because they are things that young girls struggle with everyday.  But what is a leader?  A leader is someone who can make decisions with a sound mind, considering both the pros and cons of a particular situation.  A leader is someone who takes initiative, without having to be instructed to do so.  A leader is responsible, and holds him- or herself accountable for any mishaps.  A leader is knowledgeable, in one or many areas, by either study or experience.  Simply put, a leader handles business, and other people trust in leaders.  Many young girls lack the traits needed (confidence, bravery, ambition, strength, focus) to exhibit effective leadership.

This is largely because girls are typically discouraged from displaying their leadership abilities, and because the two go hand-in-hand, such discouragement directly affects their levels of self-esteem.  discouraged_child-250x250

Many times in school, girls are teased for raising their hands if they can answer questions presented to the class by their teachers.  How many of you young girls have been called offensive names like, “goody two-shoes?”  What about “know-it-all?”  I know I have, when I was your age.  Girls are often ridiculed for showing their intelligence, and it is treated as though it were against what society considers normal girl behavior.  In many cultures around the world, girls are discouraged or even restricted by law from learning anything outside of domestic duties (cooking, cleaning, raising children, being a wife).  Because boys grow to be the men who will lead the families & communities and males are to protect females, it is believed that a boy’s worldly education is more important, whereas a girl’s focus should be on homemaking skills.  It is believed that males are supposed to lead and females are supposed to follow (by nature, which is a topic that should be taught by your parent(s) ).  While all cultures are different in their traditions, it is no secret that girls are unfortunately kept from expanding their minds beyond what is accepted by their families, friends, and others in society. Attending school, which would take their minds away from the home, is definitely out of the question.

Here in America, girls are able to attend and participate in school, however the treatment isn’t too far off from being discouraged from attending school altogether.  Girls are usually shy, and that shyness is fueled by fear of being put on the spot by their peers.  A fellow student, most commonly a boy, will blurt out a joke in an attempt to embarrass a girl, and silence her from speaking up any further in class.

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Young girls, I’d love to know, and I’m sure you’d like to know within yourselves:

  • Do you find yourselves raising your hands slowly, and halfway in the air, to avoid attracting too much attention to yourselves?  When the teacher calls on you, do you answer in a low-toned voice?
  • Do you have trouble making eye contact, or do you hold your head down when speaking?
  • Do you say “I’m sorry,” “excuse me,” or “I don’t mean to . . . ,” more than necessary?
  • Do you find yourselves holding back on correct answers?  Do you hold back on your thoughts and opinions?
  • Do you hold back on group projects, for fear of being called “bossy” if you can facilitate the progression of group work?  Do you adhere to when people say that you can’t be in charge?

 

Young girls, I’ve been there before.  I know what it feels like to second-guess yourself because someone has challenged your thinking . . . even when I know I had the right answer.  I know what it feels like to not put my all into a class project, for fear of being called names.  I know what it feels like to not be sure of the sound of my own voice, and to speak timidly.  It is a painful feeling, and believe me, I know how it feels:  it’s like we’re expected to be clueless, and then ridiculed for being clueless.  Seems like a losing battle, doesn’t it?  Well young girls, I’m here to tell you, it’s not.  As a matter of fact young girls, it’s not a battle at all.  Especially, if we don’t make it one, or allow it to become one.  self-esteem

 

Young girls, there will always be people who will try to divert your attention away from your goals.  There will always be people who will try to discourage you from achieving.  There will always be people who will doubt your skills, your smarts, your intelligence, your potential . . . and many of those people will do so simply because you are a girl.  Many will try to take control of your confidence and self-esteem levels.  Well young girls, this is where YOU come in.

You see these words over here?  These are all POSITIVE traits. womenroles.euwomen-300x187

And each one of these traits, can be found in each and every one of you wonderful young girls.  Each of you has the ability to master every trait listed in this fun illustration.  It would be damaging to believe that girls cannot be powerful, or ambitious, or outspoken.  It would diminish the confidence in a girl who is ridiculed for giving a presentation in front of her class.  Consider these words, your self-esteem boosters.  Utilize your tools, these boosters!!  Because I can bet that if each one of you amazing young girls repeats each word listed here in the above illustration, in the mirror, affirming it by first saying “I am,” and then each word right after . . . what I believe in you, you will be believe in you, too!

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Remember young girls, all great leaders didn’t start out that way.  Not everybody believed in them.  BUT, they found what they were good at, and excelled, becoming a leader (or expert) in that particular activity.  They fought through failures (which are only temporary setbacks), they continued on despite naysayers, they believed in themselves even when others around them didn’t.  Boys and girls are fit to be leaders, and it doesn’t have to be in the same activity, line of work, belief or practice, etc.  Remember that there will always be people who will purposely try to put you down.  However, you continue on regardless.  Girls are just as valuable, just as important, just as special, and just as powerful as boys . . . all in your own ways.  A boy might lead in math, a girl might lead in science.  A boy might lead in history, a girl might lead in social studies.  A boy my lead in business management, a girl might lead in economics.  A boy might lead in a group project based on art.  A girl might lead a group project based on literature.  Both might lead in finance.  Both might lead in politics.  Both might lead in medicine.  See?  We ALL can be leaders!  So young girls, let doubters (or, as many of you say, “haters”) motivate you to excel even further than you thought you could!  Those who try to discourage you, might be intimidated by you . . . so, let them be!  The only person you can control, is you.  The only person you have something to prove to, is yourself.  So make yourselves proud, young girls!  Prove yourselves right!

Believe that you achieve goals, and excel in school.  Believe that your voices matter.  Believe that YOU matter.  Don’t fear raising your hands if you know the right answers . . . be afraid of keeping it to yourselves!  Be afraid of NOT letting your lights shine!  Do not be afraid to be who & what you are! Screen-Shot-2014-03-10-at-11.27.06-AM

Our last GU4AP / MYGirls event on July 12, 2014, “Park Beautification Day” in Moreno Valley, CA, incorporated a Leadership workshop from Ban Bossy, an initiative brought to you by Lean In & Girl Scouts of the USA.  The Ban Bossy website has various downloadable activity & workshop booklets for students, teachers, parents, and troop leaders.  Each booklet contains several facts regarding females in school settings, the workforce, and environments in which girls interact with their friends.  I encourage you all to check out these booklets, as MYGirls will be using them for our upcoming Mentor / Mentee workshops.

As I conclude, young girls, I want to leave you with another list of self-esteem boosters:

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Though all of these tips may not apply to your lives, some of them will . . . so utilize your tools, your boosters!!

Next Friday’s blog:  Competition, and “Frenemies” (Part 2)

-Kahlelah, “MYGirls”

MYEvents: Thursday, September 18, 2014 – Wednesday, September 24, 2014

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Hi there, outstanding young girls!!

*~ MYEvents will run every Thursday evening at 6:00pm, Pacific Standard Time. ~*

*~MYGirls Blog Series will run every Friday evening at 6:00pm, Pacific Standard Time. ~*

 

 

MYEvents will list all upcoming events.  They will either be free & open to the community, by RSVP, or by ticket purchase.  If you see an event listed, YOU’RE INVITED!!

 

Sunday, September 21, 2014 – 

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Hair stylists from across America will come together for a chance to be honored as the Bobbi Boss 2014 “America’s Next Top Stylist.”  CLICK HERE for information, stylist registration, and consumer tickets. (I will be one of the models on the runway!)

 

Thursday, September 25, 2014

Community-Plan-Launch-September-25-2014-800x500px

The mission of the South Los Angeles Homeless Transition Age Youth (TAY) and Foster Care Collaborative is to prevent and end youth homelessness in South Los Angeles.  RSVP Here to register for the community event to help end homelessness within our youth.

 

Saturday, October 4, 2014 – 

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Inspirational community leaders will come together with Charlotte’s Korner, Inc., to encourage, empower, and uplift our youth, as various issues concerning our teens will be discussed.  CLICK HERE for more information, or how to become a volunteer, vendor, or guest speaker.  (I will be one of the guest speakers . . . updated flyer coming soon.)

 

Friday, November 14th, 2014 – 

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Dynamic leaders will be honored and celebrated on this night of wonder.  SEE INFO Here for sponsorship packages.

 

 

ON-GOING EVENTS FOR 2014 – 

banner

FREE!!  Parenting Classes for Africans, African Americans, and Caribbeans.
Unfortunately NO court- or D.C.F.S.-ordered clientele will be accepted.
Call (323) 777-3120 for more information.

Brought to you by the Coalition of Mental health Professionals, Inc.
9219 S. Broadway Ave., Los Angeles, CA 90003

 

 

Staying in the know with what’s going on in the community, helps us to stay connected to each other. and keep our youth with an optimistic mindset.  We must work together for the good of our world, our countries, our states, our nations, our cultures, our communities, our neighborhoods, our families . . . and ourselves.  For we are all “family.”  Fellow members of the human race.  We need each other more than we might know.

Share these events with your families.  And if there are any events that you know of and would like to share with MYGirls, please contact me, and I will list them.  Let’s get involved, young girls!!

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-Kahlelah, MYGirls

MYGirls: Let’s Talk About Appearance & Personal Hygiene (Part 2: Appearance)

ATTENTION ALL YOUNG GIRLS:

*~ The MYGirls Blog Series will run every Friday, at 6:00pm Pacific Standard Time. ~*

Hello lovely young girls!

How are you all doing???  School is back in session, how are you classes going?  Are you well-adjusted to the teaching styles of your instructors?  Are you grasping the work in class, and understanding your homework?  Hopefully the answers to all these questions, is a confident “Yes!”  However, do not be discouraged if you have to answer “No.”  It is okay to need, and seek, help for yourselves.  We all are imperfect creatures, and a helping hand is typically a non-judgmental hand.

Last Friday’s blog piece was on Part 1 of a 2-Part entry:  Appearance & Personal Hygiene, with Part 1 being Personal Hygiene.  Last week’s topic focused on the importance of minding how often you allow your friends to use your health & beauty products (soaps, lotions, body sprays, lip balms & glosses, etc.), lest you make yourselves susceptible to the passing of germs, which can lead to allergic reactions, infections, and other possible ailments and illnesses.  As Part 1 pertained to how you take care of yourselves, Part 2, Appearance, will focus on how you present yourselves.

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Presentation is SO important when it comes to showing yourselves to the world.  There’s an old saying that goes, “you never get a second chance to make a first impression.”  While it is true that wo/man makes the clothes and not the other way around, the way that one dresses sets the tone for others to formulate their opinions about him or her, whether accurate about the person or otherwise.

When you are making yourselves visible to the world, you are showing the world who and what you are, based on the first impression they get from you.  No, you should not judge a book by its cover, however there is a reason why an author puts much time & thought into how he or she would like to illustrate the book title and cover.  Something has to attract the reader, and the visual must be persuasive enough to prompt the reader to check out the book’s overview . . . and possibly make the purchase from the bookstore or check-out from the library.  It’s all in the presentation!

Young girls, how do you see yourselves when you look in the mirror? stock-photo-10337028-young-girl-tries-on-crown-looking-in-mirror While we are defining ourselves based on likes, dislikes, strengths, weaknesses, and how we relate to the rest of the world, we must also keep in mind that we are defining ourselves AND being defined.  Not initially by others, but rather by what we do when we present ourselves.  While no one else can define you, what you do to define yourself, can actually work against you.

If you have been keeping up with the blog entries from our GU4AP / MYG bloggers (outside of the MYGirls blog series), you will notice our fabulous blogger Ashley ( @ ) gave insight on great ways to present yourselves in her blog entry, “Age Appropriate Back to School Fashion Outfits for Young Girls . . . ”  I would like to expand a bit further on the importance of presentation, regarding possible messages others could be interpreting when viewing your first impression.

  • Wearing age-appropriate attire is extremely important, especially in young girls whose bodies have developed into shapes usually seen on adult females.  A young girl must first understand her body and its development, puberty, her sexuality, the vast differences between an adolescent and an adult, and the possible message she could give off if wearing makeup, tight or revealing clothing, high heels, hairstyles typically seen on adult females, long acrylic or press-on nails, and anything that screams “grown-up.”  Makeup is not for young girls.  High heels are not for young girls.  Tight or revealing clothing is not for young girls.  Multiple ear or body piercings are not for young girls.  Certain hairstyles are not for young girls.  We stress confidence, self-love, and we also stress self-respect.
  • As much as we must pay attention to how we are fixing ourselves up, we must also pay attention to the times we make NO effort to give good presentation.  While the exterior does not speak for the interior, the exterior could possibly distract the viewer, turning him or her away from the main goal of getting to the interior.  Hairstyles nowadays straddle the fence between ‘neat’ and ‘unkempt’, so there is really no defining base.  However, that does not mean to present yourself looking as though you rolled out of bed five minutes prior.  We must dress for what we want, and look the part.  Why?  Well, because you wouldn’t want to sit at the station of a manicurist who has dirty nails.  You wouldn’t want to sit in the chair of a hairstylist whose hair is all over the place . . . not in any particular style or pattern.  You wouldn’t want to buy food from a chef who came to work looking like he or she ran through a dust storm.  What clients would trust them and their service(s)?  None of those people would be dressed to look their parts.  It’s only fair that they don’t expect business to be good.

Young girls, remember as I said, you always want to “look the part.”  You always want to dress for what you want.  Your initial appearance is what gets others to believe in your words, your business, your product(s), your insight, your views.  And this means way more than the labels and price tags attached to the clothing you wear.

If you want success, you must dress like you’re going to find it. iammichelleO_v2

 

 

Please understand, young girls, that paying attention to your appearance and presentation, is not to make you stuck-up, snobby, self-conscious, or to make you superficial.  Paying attention to the way you look, is exhibiting self-love, self-worth, self-respect, and self-esteem.  When you look good, you feel good, and when you feel good, you tend to want to DO good.  And when done with the proper guidance, you’ll always BE good.

 

Remember young girls, 1098168_10152162918519128_581882700_n1, and show the world how to love you too!!

 

-Kahlelah, “MYGirls”

MYGirls: Blog Series Update

Hi there young girls!!

 

As you may have already read, GU4AP’s “MYGirls” Program has implemented the “MYGirls” Blog Series, a collection of entries zeroing in on issues that affect young girls, ages 8-18.  The “MYGirls” Blog Series will offer sound advice by illustrating fictitious scenarios that may be familiar in the lives of our girls, as well as personal experience(s) from our Mentors.  The blog series will also open the opportunity for discussions between our Mentors and Mentees, to hopefully break down any fear or shyness when approaching certain subject matter.

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At first, we had no set time over the next few months (or however much time we figured it would take) as to when the blogs would be posted for viewing . . . and we realized that THAT needed to change, into a more structured method.  That being said, the “MYGirls” Blog Series will be issued every Friday, at 6:00pm, and will contain blog entries based on the following subjects:

 

  • Social Media Etiquette
  • Appearance & Personal Hygiene (now broken into two parts)
  • Academics
  • Leadership & Self-Esteem
    –Competition, “Frenemies”
  • Safety
    –Rape, Self-Defense
  • Health
    –Diet
    –Exercise
    –Mentality

 

There will be certain blog entries specifically for our girls, ages 12-18 (for these entries, we do advise having a parent or legal guardian present, to read along with you):

 

  • Commitment, Loyalty, and Relationships
    –Contraception, Sex
  • Health
    –Menstruation

 

Today’s blog will be Part 1:  Personal Hygiene, at 6:00pm this evening.

 

We at Girls Unite 4 A Purpose (GU4AP) want you young girls to know that we are here for you.  We know that you may have questions, concerns, and worries, and we hope that the information we share will give you insight, along with the courage to press forward through life’s challenges.

 

You have a safe space in the “MYGirls” Program . . . girls-hanging-out-590x295 . . . consider this your 2nd home!!

 

–Kahlelah, “MYGirls”

MYGirls: Let’s Talk About Social Media Etiquette

Hello young girls!!

So as I previously stated in the introduction to the “MYGirls” Blog Series, we will post various blog entries over the next few months (or how ever long it may take), on topics like Social Media Etiquette, Appearance & Personal Hygiene (and our blogger Emily Jean is ideal to follow for beauty & skin care tips), Academics (our blogger Christina is ideal to follow for education tips), Leadership & Self-Esteem, and more! These blog entries are here for you to read while you are still on summer break (as well as while in school), will serve as helpful guides filled with knowledge, typically gained from experience, to assist you as you leave your mark in the free world of “cyberspace.”

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Social media are very powerful tools used to make personal, political, social, fashion, religious, educational, and familial statements . . . through a wide range of discuss topics. All forms of social media (Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Youtube, etc.) allow users to reach out to a large group of people, depending on the sizes of their friendslists, in a short period of time. And depending on the size of a user’s following, said statements can be made on either a national or international level. Imagine the amount of social power!!

The power of social media is so strong, that it can make you . . . or break you. The power of social media can build up or tear down your reputation. The power of social media can leave others thinking your are pretty awesome, or believing things about you that go against your character.

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Have you taken the time to assess what’s in your social media?  Our online profiles allow us to display parts of us that we want others to see and know.  However, some people might gather different messages–you want people to see or know vs. who and what you really are–and the confusion eventually makes its way to the surface.  And that is how others form their perceptions of you.

So, what kind of social media users are you in your friendslists?

  1. Do you know the Over-Sharer?  She’s the one who shares every waking moment of her life, from the time she yawned when she first woke up in the morning, to the color of toothpaste she uses, to the temperature she set the oven on to bake biscuits for breakfast.  Note how those three examples are just in the morning . . . because the Over-Sharer will also have a list of afternoon movements, and evening step-by-step commentary.  People are interested in current happenings, but nobody needs to know how many steps there are from your bedroom to the bathroom, or any other behind-the-scenes footage of things majority of your friends do everyday.
  2. Do you know the Semi-Celebrity?  She’s the one who makes it a point to share celebrity-oriented status updates.   She may or may not do any real work in the entertainment industry, but that does not stop her from blasting her industry involvement to her world of viewers.  She wants to feel important, like a hot topic (perhaps influenced by gossip media), so majority of her posts are of pictures posed with celebrities, parties, events at which she managed to walk to red carpet, and anything else that can persuade people to identify her with Hollywood.  She looks for haters for self-validation.
  3. Do you know the Bragger?  She, similar to the Semi-Celebrity, makes it a point to post everything new in her life, especially expensive purchases.  She will make sure to post pictures of the new items purchased by her, her parents, or even her boyfriend:  wardrobe selections, expensive designer labels, new or newly-washed car (particularly if she or someone in her life has managed to purchase a Mercedes, BMW, Lexus, or any other luxury vehicle), her new hairstyle, her new makeup collection or makeup job done by the makeup artist from the makeup store.  Unfortunately, her aim is to build herself up by making others jealous or envious, with various status updates and photos uploaded in the spirit of “I have one, you don’t.”  She, like the Semi-Celebrity, also looks for haters for self-validation.
  4. Do you know the Pessimist?  She is the one who sees everything negatively in life.  Nothing positive comes from her.  Instead of being happy for waking up in the morning, she is irritated that she woke up a few minutes before her alarm.  Instead of being happy about heading to work, she is frustrated about traffic (something completely out of her control).  Every post has #FML, “forget my life” (even though the F word isn’t exactly “forget”) attached at the end.  A neighbor is always bothering her.  A family member is always getting on her nerves.  Everyone is hating on her.
  5. Do you know the Argument Lover?  She’s the one who debates every political bill, every current event, every news story, every historical fact, every theory, every social construct, every double standard, every form of racism, prejudice, discrimination, and social injustice, for the sake of forcing her views onto others with no regard to differences in views and opinions.  She does not rest until everyone with whom she is arguing (though she might think she is “debating”), sees her point, and she does not understand how people are allowed to “agree to disagree.”  She may feel threatened by someone who does not share the same views and opinions as hers, and quickly shuts downs if she cannot dominate a discussion.
  6. Do you know the Over-Sexual Attention Seeker?  She is the one who dresses way too sexy (short shorts, tight skirts, dresses & jeans, low-cut tops exposing her cleavage, wearing only bra & panties, etc.), not appropriate for her age, and takes suggestive photos to upload in order to get attention from boys.  She sees how some women conduct themselves in entertainment media (music videos, magazines, TV shows, movies), and attempts to emulate what she sees, because she feels that is what gets boys to like her or find her attractive.  Unfortunately she gets her self-image of beauty from the way others see her . . . sexually.
  7. Do you know the Know-It-All?  She is the one who feels as though she has the answer for everything, much like the Argument Lover.  With the exception of things that have only one right answer, she feels as though her answers to various topics are the only answers that anyone can, or should, be able to think of.  She always “knows” about everything, has seen and done everything, and can give you a better recount of everything than if you were to try anything yourself.

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I think at some point, everyone can find at least one person in their friendslist who fits into one of these descriptions.  Be sure to assess your friends, and then see about yourself.  Check how YOU utilize social media.  Why?  Because people are watching, and not just your friends.  Your family members are watching.  Your teachers, school officials, and/or coaches could be watching.  The founders and presidents of your clubs & organizations could be watching.  If any of you managed to get summer jobs, your bosses could be watching, and many companies will hire or fire you based on your online profiles.  Be mindful that you could very well fall into one of these descriptions.  From experience, I’ve fallen into at least three of these categories before!!

Use social media to your advantage.  Make the most of your online profiles, in a positive light.  Let people know you know goodness, not drama.  Let people see you as a person to whom they can come for inspiration.  You’re an awesome young girl . . . show the world!!

-Kahlelah, “MYGirls”

Girls Unite 4 A Purpose, “MYGirls” Blog Series

Greetings beautiful young girls!!

 

Welcome to Girls Unite 4 A Purpose!!  GU4AP is an organization geared towards inspiring and uplifting females, from young girls to adults, in efforts to encourage confidence, leadership, and self-esteem, as they move through life’s various endeavors & obstacles.  We seek to stress to importance of love & respect for one another, teamwork, cultivating strong alliances & friendships, and service to others.

That being said, GU4AP would like to introduce the “MYGirls” Blog Series, a collection of entries zeroing in on issues that affect young girls, ages 8-18.  The “MYGirls” Blog Series will offer sound advice by illustrating fictitious scenarios that may be familiar in the lives of our girls, as well as personal experience(s) from our Mentors.  The blog series will also open the opportunity for discussions between our Mentors and Mentees, to hopefully break down any fear or shyness when approaching certain subject matter.

Over the next few months (or however much time it may take), the “MYGirls” Blog Series will contain blog entries based on the following subjects:

 

  • Social Media Etiquette
  • Appearance & Personal Hygiene
  • Academics
  • Leadership & Self-Esteem
    –Competition, “Frenemies”
  • Safety
    –Rape, Self-Defense
  • Health
    –Diet
    –Exercise
    –Mentality

 

There will be certain blog entries specifically for our girls, ages 12-18 (for these entries, we do advise having a parent or legal guardian present, to read along with you):

 

  • Commitment, Loyalty, and Relationships
    –Contraception, Sex
  • Health
    –Menstruation

 

We at Girls Unite 4 A Purpose (GU4AP) want you young girls to know that we are here for you.  We know that you may have questions, concerns, and worries, and we hope that the information we share will give you insight, along with the courage to press forward through life’s challenges.  You have a safe space in the “MYGirls” Program . . . consider this your 2nd home!!

 

–Kahlelah, “MYGirls”

 

GU4AP’s 1st annual “Park Beautification Day,” 7/12/14

Whew! What a day it was . . .

As we Mentors made our ways from our respective residences to Towngate Memorial Park in Moreno Valley, CA, we hadn’t the slightest idea of what would be the overall outcome of our 1st annual Girls Unite 4 A Purpose “Park Beautification” event.  We locked in the location, secured our spot for a park bench & BBQ pit, divided the logistics between our awesome Founding CEO & Director of Queens Unite Everywhere (QUE), our Director of Public Relations & “MYGirls,” and Breyawna our fabulous Events Coordinator.  We had Lia, our Mentor & resident Beauty Queen (crowned Miss California Plus America 2014) set up the decorations which turned our day into a beautiful luau . . . and of course, we brought the beverages, food & fixings, along with the #BanBossy workshop supplies and gift bags for all attendees.

Lastly, we had Sasha, Omolara, Faith, and Ty’Kea, our eager Volunteers  who soon became new Mentors. 20140712_111042

Yet, we were short the most important element:  Mentees.

Determined to expect the unexpected and not forget about the reason for the day, we at GU4AP decided to take a small detour, redirecting our focus to training the new Mentors, while leaving the invitation open to any young girl interested in what we had going on.  Prepping our new Mentors for their future Mentor/Mentee relationships, we stressed the importance of communication, leadership, self-esteem, and teamwork; well into our morning #BanBossy workshop, our Mentors were able to exercise leadership and initiative by taking gift bags to a mother and grandmother near our setup, for them to take home to any young girls in their families.

 

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Our day was running smoothly.  Until a minor setback made it get much smoother . . .

A malfunction with the luau decorations opened up the door of opportunity:  a cluster of our balloons flew a few yards away from our spot, which caught the attention of a group of 5 young girls, ranging from ages 8 to 16.  Shy at first, the girls found interest in GU4AP, and opted to join us for the entire event duration.  The exchanges of names, issuance of food & beverages, gifting of bags, and meeting of parents & sharing of our organization’s purpose, recharged the motivation within all of us to press forward in our quest to reach out to young girls.  Before our very eyes, we saw how expecting the unexpected made for the enjoyment and ending of an overall perfect day!

 

So, WHY did we do what we did on Saturday morning?  WHY did we reach out to young girls in the communities?

Because there are so many young girls who feel alone, invisible, objectified, scared, silenced, unattractive, unsure of themselves.  There are so many young girls in our communities who don’t have positive role models to look up to.  There are so many young girls who lack goals, aspirations, who have never made any life plans, whether short term or long term.  There are so many young girls with questions, concerns, worries about life, school, the future, and especially what it means to be a Woman. There are so many young girls in our communities who turn to negative entities as outlets.  There are so many young girls who lack confidence, and are yearning for positive ways to express themselves.     20140712_110937

 

 

We at Girls Unite 4 A Purpose (GU4AP), which houses Queens Unite Everywhere (QUE) and “MYGirls,” aim to inspire and uplift the young girls in our respective communities, and around the world when our power and outreach increases.  Through activities, workshops, leadership & team-building exercises, writing projects and more, we believe that our work will greatly impact the lives of our young girls, and influence them to be the best of themselves that they could ever be.

 

Parents, PLEASE get your young girls involved.  If you have daughters, nieces, granddaughters, Goddaughters, etc . . . GU4AP welcomes you!

 

-Kahlelah, “MYGirls”

 

2014 Dear Younger Me Campaign: Open Letter to Chrisselle…

Dear 15 year old Chrisselle,

I know what you’re going through, and I know it’s hard but I’ve got some things to tell you so please just listen. Don’t lock yourself in your room and ignore me, or write in your diary that nobody gets it, because I do. I really, really do.

You think that you need to grow up already, you think that you need to have lots of friends so that you’re not lonely, you think you need to be in a relationship so that you’re not alone and you feel like you don’t fit in… anywhere, never mind your clothes. You think you need all these things just to be happy, but trust me you don’t.

All you need to be happy is self-belief, true friends, real family and determination to make your dreams come true – because believe me you can. Heck, you already HAVE. If you only knew where you’re going to be in six years then you would laugh at what your thoughts on the world are at this moment.

You’re probably thinking to yourself “Yeah, well that’s great. But I don’t have any of THAT either!” well, honey, you’re wrong. You have some of the best friends that you could ever wish for, sometimes it may not feel like that, but trust me they are. They have their own stuff going on too, but that doesn’t mean that they’re not there for you or that they don’t love the bones of you. AS for family, every family has drama but as you get older you’re going to discover who is really there for you and who isn’t, and those who stick by you are some of the best human beings on this planet.

In a few years you’re going to meet people who are going to change your life, at times it won’t feel like it’s for the best, but in the long term it is. They’re going to make you stronger, wiser and braver than you ever thought you could be. You’re going to use these qualities to change other people’s lives and I guarantee you that that will be the best feeling in the world.

You’ll find love and loss love as you grow, but those people will impact your life in ways you never thought possible. Then one day when you think that you’re fine on your own, you’re going to meet someone who you never thought could exist. He’s perfect in every single way, and he’ll become your best friend, your lover, your rock and more importantly your future.

My message to you is to stop stressing just now. Enjoy these years of your life because soon you’ll be facing all the stresses of adulthood and wishing for these problems instead. Life gets better when you start living it, so start. You’re alive but you’re not living, that’s the only change you need to make right now. Make that change and everything else will follow.

Also, I love you. Mum loves you. Dad loves you. Your siblings love you. You’re going to find out that your best friend has been beside you since you were born in the shape of your annoying big sister.

Yours Faithfully,
Chrisselle Mowatt
22 years old.
www.Chrisselle.com

P.S. Stop thinking you’re ugly, worthless and need to make changes to your looks. You’re beautiful.

Pregnancy: Don’t Lose Focus of Your Education…

“Eighteen and 19-year-olds – i.e., college age women – account for two-thirds of all those pregnancies. In one Virginia study, 24% of college women will become pregnant at some point during their college careers. In 2009, Utah women’s graduation rates were 6 percent below the rate of Utah men, and 2% below the national average of women.” (About.com/Young Adults).


According to an article by writer Jackie Burrell, titled “ Teen Pregnancy Rates and Sexual Activity Statistics”, too many young women are enrolling in college with high hopes and big dreams, but unfortunately dropping out with unexpected pregnancies and even mental illnesses. For example, many female students become attracted to their male peers and fantasize about possible futures with these men and in doing so they lose sight of their studies and focus on their boyfriends. It must be understood that most young men in college are in the prime of their “wild” life experiences. College men tend to look forward to having crazy fun such as sleeping with as many girls as they like and partying every night where as college women uphold fairytales of finding a possible fiance.
Too many times, I have seen intelligent and confident women gain independence while living in the dorms or living off campus and then fall into the stigma of “playing house” and lose some amount of confidence because they are trying too hard to hook those possible husbands. Again, college men are not looking for wives, they are looking forward to having fun and doing their own thing. Everyday, a young girl loses sight of her academic goals because she is working and using her financial aid (even her parents’ money) to cook and feed some man she claims to be in love with. YOUR PARENTS ARE NOT SACRIFICING AND PAYING SCHOOL LOANS FOR YOU TO SUPPORT A MAN, they are working to prepare you for life in the REAL WORLD.

As a woman, I agree that when you fall for someone, you want to have him over your parent-free place and cater to him, but there is a thin line between doing nice things for your boyfriend and “providing” for him. The life of any student is not cheap nor easy which is why if you’re not careful a man or even friends will use you for your resources. Resources include your transportation which helps them get around town to the parties or even your groceries.

Overall ladies, my message to you all is that socially, college is no joke. If you thought high school had its typical drama or peer pressure, you were wrong. Being away at college involves you being away from your foundation and comfort zones at home. I guarantee your morals, beliefs and individuality will be tested. College is a step up from high school but it can also be a dangerous step if you do not prepare yourself mentally and emotionally. In the midst of partying and mingling with peers, you will find that peer pressure is more apparent than ever. The supposed fabulous social life of sorority girls may influence you do engage in immoral activities or the constant partying with men can result in unprotected sex or even alcohol-influenced sex, which is a form of rape considering that your incompetence.

You must remember who you are as a person and where you draw the line between being social and being used. Remind yourself of the hard work you and your love ones completed just for you to make it into college. DON’T JEOPARDIZE all those efforts. Yes college is about having new experiences and having fun, but you don’t want to do anything that you may regret in the future. Your years in college can make or break your future. For instance, whether you slide through college with Cs or get straight As, employers who require a degree will view your official transcripts which will say a lot about just how “responsible and reliable” you were during your academic career. Graduate college as a mature and independent leader, not bitter and depressed because you’ve been used and hurt by others you blindly trusted.

Dominique English (MYGirls Event Coordinator)